The Real Reason Your Team Isn’t Moving With You

Ever feel like you’re pulling hard in the right direction, but the people around you are standing still?

You know the work matters. You’re all in. But when it’s time to move, you’re pulling more than leading.

You’re not imagining it.

Research from Dr. Brené Brown shows that real commitment is built through shared meaning.  

That shared meaning only happens when leaders are willing to be clear. As Brown says ‘clear is kind’. Unclear breeds confusion, resentment, and distrust. If people don’t understand why the work matters or if it doesn’t feel personal to them, they won’t stay connected to it.

No matter how passionate or committed you are.

In aviation, before any aircraft lifts off, crews do a ‘pre-flight brief’. It’s where the aircraft captain briefs the crew on the mission (the purpose) and any specific details they need to be aware of to get the job done. Together.

Because in high-stakes environments, isolated effort doesn’t cut it. Everyone has to see the bigger picture and own their piece of it.

Intentional leadership works the same way.

It is not enough to be passionate yourself. You have to create a culture where others can see themselves in the mission. You don’t get buy-in by pulling harder. You get it by inviting people to take hold of the rope with you.

✅ Share the bigger picture. Why does it matter?

✅ Ask them where they see themselves in it. 

✅ Make success visible and shared.

James Kouzes and Barry Posner, in The Leadership Challenge, say it best:

"People will not follow you until they can see themselves in the story you are telling."

That starts with intentional conversations.

Not just about what. But about the why.

So, if you’re feeling isolated in your energy right now. If you’re tired of pulling without traction.

Maybe it is not about working harder at all.

Maybe it’s time to check if anyone knows where you’re trying to go.

Because great leadership at work, at home, or anywhere isn’t about dragging people across the line. It’s about building enough trust, vision, and clarity that others choose to run alongside you.

Love to hear your thoughts.